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Second Wednesday of Advent

Scripture Reading for Today:

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Along for the Ride

by Andrew Benson


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I was standing in a church basement on a cold winter day in Edmonton when I received one of the best compliments of my life.  “Overall, you’re not an a**hole."  I mean, does it get any better than that? Our church was running a grassroots day shelter in the basement of another church in the city; this is where my life was forever changed because of real conversations just like this one. Up to this point in my life, I had mostly lived out my faith in Jesus either privately or only on Sundays. Ok, and the classic midweek bible study, small group, whatever (Just to be clear, these are all awesome). I remember being metaphorically smashed in the face with the reality of being a follower of Jesus the other six days of the week. I felt rocked because I didn’t know how to live out my faith outside formal, professional, ministry settings. I had this weird desire to see the Bible come alive in my city, but I didn’t know what that looked like. At this moment, I had a revelation from God that was spoken through someone in a church basement. Overall, I wasn’t an a**hole. I realized that following Jesus isn’t about having everything flow nice and smooth, having all the answers, or experiencing life as if I’ve got it all figured out. What a relief.

Change and disruption in our lives can take many forms. Sometimes we throw ourselves into it, and sometimes we feel change thrust upon us; changing jobs, moving to a different part of town, change in political leadership, hopefully changing our socks! For many of us, this has been a year full of disruption, and it can be a struggle to have the courage to keep going. For others, disruption has been a normal part of life. Change and disruption impact each of us differently. What about when we experience a change of heart? Or those moments when a long-held belief suddenly begins to crumble, and we are left questioning everything? The critical thing to keep in mind here is that questioning is ok. When we experience a disruption in our faith, it can be scary.

Let's be honest. We start asking questions like, Do I still believe?  Can I overcome this? Have I believed in lies? Fear can then overwhelm us.  We may even default to wrestling alone.  Who do I talk to about this?  Hey, I don’t know how much of this Christian thing I believe anymore, maybe even none of it?  Questioning is often viewed as doubting or seen as weakness or something "not good." Questioning is about exploring our curiosity, searching for wisdom rather than answers.  When we ask deep heartfelt questions, what’s important and what we care about is ultimately revealed. The grace that God gives us is more than for the forgiveness of our sins but grace for everyday life and along with it, our many challenges and doubts.

Lord, help us to be loving and curious people and to see the world around us in new ways through your eyes. 

Change and Chaos are like best friends. Depending on the day, they either bring the best or worst out of eachother. Since leaving my hometown, I have lived in cities all across Canada, and currently, I am calling Yellowknife, NT home. My resume reads like a potluck menu on a Sunday afternoon! There is a little bit of everything in there. My parents divorced when I was young, and that brought forward a lot of change; some I understood, some I had no idea. I was bullied as a kid, and growing up meant constant disruption. Often I’d be wondering, Which way will I run today to avoid getting beaten up on my way home? As an adult, it looks more like, which city will I live in next? I also find myself struggling with self-confidence, body image issues, feeling like I'm not enough, and loneliness. What if change and disruption could be an opportunity for stillness and intimacy with God? I have often reflected on the words of James 4:8, as we draw near to God, he draws near to us. 

Change and disruption challenge our ideas about what we think we deserve or what we believe we control. It reveals our humanness and forces us to lead with our weaknesses rather than our strengths. Our natural tendency is to keep pushing forward. How many times have I heard people say things like, "Don't just go through it, grow through it."  Are we sure we need to maximize every moment?  

Lord, help us reconsider the exhausting need to always come out on top,
make it worth it, be better for it.  We invite you Jesus, come be the strength in our weakness.

Sometimes we have to fight and crawl our way through things. Other times we need to pump the brakes, maybe even full stop. I have been learning to chill out more and pray and seek the leading of the Holy Spirit. We need to find ways of doing this together as a community as well. Before we keep on trucking, maybe we need to pray with each other. Where is God in this? It's in these moments where I want to encounter Jesus on the messed up road of life. How is the life of Jesus reflected in us as a community? How is our personal relationship with Him lived out in community?

When people encountered Jesus, there were many responses. Some left everything to follow Jesus; some had a complete change of focus in their business. Others went home and shared stories. Others were confused and said things like, “I believe, help my unbelief."  There was once a time where someone said to Jesus they wanted to follow him, and Jesus replied, “Nah, go home.”  There is no “one way” of being a Christian and following Jesus. We are invited to love our neighbours, encourage one another, be forgiven, and in turn, forgive others. These are tough days, and it’s easier than ever to get lost in all the opinions, messages, and ideas out there. I don't know about you, but now more than ever – I want to be close to Jesus; To know him and be known by Him. My heart is convicted and held captive by the wonder and curiosity of what God is teaching us as his people. As a church, if all we have learned during the COVID-19 pandemic is how to do Sunday worship services differently, I believe we have missed out on something more extraordinary; nearness to God and each other. I take great comfort today in the words of Jeremiah 30:22 as it whispers boldly to the soul of the church, "you will be my people, and I will be your God."  


Thank you for reading the New Leaf Advent Reader, a collection of reflections from writers across Canada. If you are enjoying the reader, sign up to receive the readings in your inbox each day here: SIGN UP

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Andrew will be our guest in the Learning Centre tomorrow!

One of the ways we have been connecting online since the pandemic pushed us online is through our Learning Centre, a weekly interactive Zoom call on a topic with a Canadian voice of wisdom. For the season of Advent, we will be featuring a few of our writers and making space to reflect together on the Advent Reader articles. Join us for the interactive sessions on Thursdays at 1:30 pm (Eastern time) or sign up and view the recordings of the sessions afterwards. SIGN UP for the Learning Centre Advent sessions.


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